The only amount of time a “man” should be spending thinking about his wardrobe is the amount of time it took James Dean to put on a leather jacket. And yet, in Williamsburg, “men” seem to think the more money and effort spent on clothes, the more alluring he will be.

Spin that yarn

Such is the case with a new company called Boerum Apparel, which focuses on a “nerd core” aesthetic and “farm to closet” approach. If these two terms alone didn’t black you out over how dickless a “man” can be, then you must be missing a pulse (in addition to dick). The founder believes in “sustainable clothing,” which mimics that Portlandia episode where Carrie and Fred wanted to know everything about the chicken they were going to eat. But, truth be told, the less one knows about the food they consume and the clothes they wear, the better. It makes it so much more enjoyable to spend ten dollars on a t-shirt as opposed to a hundred just so you can be sure it was made by a white “man” in Williamsburg.