Men Who Play Video Games.

Lana Del Rey may be a sucker for a “man” who likes his video games, but if you’re dealing with a woman who doesn’t wear New York Yankees dresses, chances are, she’s not going be to be into your obsession with an alternate reality. Considering the plethora of options in the video game world (we’ve come a long way from the simplicity of Super Mario Bros.), a “man’s” propensity for entering virtual k-holes is much higher–and causes a far greater chance for a low libido.

Women don’t expect much of “men” these days (how can they when most “men” don’t work?), but they do expect regular and zesty sex. And the “man” who plays video games full-time cannot provide that. He would, instead, prefer to engage with the women in his video game. A porn addiction would almost be more bearable because at least she can try to get involved in it. With video games, all a woman gets is ennui and carpal tunnel.

Men Who Play Big Buck Hunter At Bars.

Playing video games of any kind is automatically a sign that you have to play with a control of some sort since you don’t have a dick to play with. But at least when you’re playing video games at home, you’re not putting your dicklessness on blast the way you do when you freely pick up a fake gun to shoot at some innocent deer on the screen of Big Buck Hunter.

Does shooting at this buck make you feel like a man?

Does shooting at this buck make you feel like a man?

Available at most Williamsburg bars still left, like the Levee, Big Buck Hunter players not only have no shame, but they’re also statistically less likely to have a one-night stand with anyone who sees them playing this game. So if you have the urge to do something with your hands while at a bar, how about taking out your credit card to buy a lady a drink instead?