It is one thing to be gustatorily inclined, but it is quite another to want to go to a fucking museum about it. With the Museum of Food and Drink opening up in prime d-bag territory, near McCarren Park, all the “foodie” guys without dicks are going to be swarming around it.

Can’t you just eat instead of looking at food?

Not only does a “Food & Drink Museum” conjure images of like old ass moldy epicurean non-delights, it also screams pretension. Can’t you just eat instead of looking at your food and trying to “inspire day-to-day curiosity about what we eat and why.” We eat because we’re fucking hungry, bottom line. Or in some dickless “men’s” case, to find refuge in something that makes us forget we don’t have a dick. Maybe this is why most of the board of trustees for the museum are “men.” But one supposes it’s better than a Nancy Kerrigan and Tonya Harding Museum.