Men Who Throw Salt Shakers At “Privilege” Bitches.

Because New York persists in becoming increasingly like the plot of J.G. Ballard’s High-Rise, the undercurrent of class-related jealousies continue to crop up in the most unlikely of ways–the latest being a subtle homage to the Ying Yang Twins in that a “man” felt compelled to heave a salt shaker at a 23-year-old girl standing outside of the Alligator Lounge in Williamsburg.

Granted, the ilk that gravitates there isn’t exactly aware of “the struggle” as fully as others. Yet, surely they must be mildly desperate if they’re trying to get a free pizza with their drink. The “man” in question was not identified with ethnicity, though, suffice it to say, he probably had it in for white girls “peppering” the neighborhood, perhaps lending some intentional poetry to his weapon choice.

His use of the derogatory phrase, “privilege bitch” instead of “privileged bitch” also indicates that maybe if he had a little bit more fucking education he would 1) know how to properly insult someone and 2) wouldn’t be so goddamn uppity about his station in life. “Men” don’t throw salt shakers at women, they use them to season the elegant meal they’ve prepared for them in their condo.

Men Who Play Bingo.

It’s not really clear to me why any “man” under the age of 65 would want to play bingo, but for some reason, Williamsburg is a big champion of the so-called game. Under the guise of parading it as a bar activity, bingo reigns supreme at places like Videology, Alligator Lounge and Pete’s Candy Store. For a “man” to willingly play this game is quite beyond me. Perhaps, in its own way, it makes him feel more dickful.

This is the type of hipster shtick that lures in the men of Williamsburg to play bingo

This is the type of hipster shtick that lures in the men of Williamsburg to play bingo

The symbolism of this game, in which a man tries to “hit the right spot” is all too glaring in terms of his inadequacies in the boudoir. If you can’t give a woman an O through oral or normal means (which is unlikely what with your dick missing and all), then of course you’re going to try to console yourself with the “free space” at the center of the bingo board. At least you can touch the right area somewhere, since you can’t seem to on a woman’s vajay.