Like most holidays, the concept and meaning behind the Fourth of July has long ago gotten away from many Americans (hint: it’s about our own prehistoric version of Brexit). And, of course, residents of the North Brooklyn vicinity are no exception. Although they like to think they’re special or a band apart from the Midwest and whatever other nondescript region exists within this country, the truth is, those who stay in town are going to do exactly what every other American is: “grill out.”

No one is really sure when this expression came about. Missing A Dick surmises it was probably sometime in the 1950s, when being masculine meant sizzling a lot of meat at once. Though, of course, there is nothing more rife with homoerotic overtones. And because, for whatever reason, there is no practice truly as “American” as barbecuing hamburgers and hot dogs, made most often during the summertime, “grilling out” eventually seemed to bleed into Fourth of July festivities. And yet, the “man” who extends this very specifically worded invitation to you has no excuse for using such terminology. You’re better off going with the bloke who offers to buy you a six-pack and sit in the park to watch the other saps (a 50s term I’m trying to bring back) “grill out.” Then again, you’ll probably just have to do such things with your female best friend who you’ll invariably end up marrying anyway because she knows better than to use douche bag phrases that offend you.