Men Who Masturbate on the L Train.

If Two by Alberto Moravia has taught us anything, it’s that a “man” can’t be held responsible for the actions of his dick. But when one is figuratively missing one, how can this be true? In any case, a “man” riding through Williamsburg at the Lorimer stop seemed to prove Moravia’s point that the “male” mind lies inside of his penis.

L train: not exactly spank bank material

L train: not exactly spank bank material

The perpetrator in question began tossing off in response to the presence of a woman in her 20s (usually the cutoff age range to be deemed “masturbatable”), going so far as to take up a horizontal position while doing so. First of all, there is nothing conducive to getting hard on the L train–it’s a cess pool of bad smells, fashion and literary taste. Second of all, don’t you got a house? That’s the appropriate place to masturbate. And even if you don’t have one, find an alley like any decent homeless person or degenerate. The train is foul enough as it is.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s