Being that Williamsburg is one of the primary douche bag hubs of New York City, it’s no shock that the “men” who flock there are willing to flaunt their dicklessness by waiting as long as two hours in order to sit in a cramped, grease-scented space and stuff their faces with a fried chicken box.

It’s hard to say why “men” are so willing to relinquish their dick by waiting to eat at Pies ‘n’ Thighs. Is it to impress their one-night stand from the previous evening or is it to soak up the residual alcohol still in their system? One can never be certain. But all I know is, there’s a Checkers nearby that gives you way more bang for your buck and has the greasy food scene on lockdown. And that’s how you impress a lady.