Because Williamsburg “men” have a general tendency toward a certain feyness/daintiness, cooking is a skill that’s a little too involved for their specific “talents.” In spite of still being regarded as “a woman’s job,” culinary ability bears the mark of a man with a dick. As for the average Wburg “man,” if they’re not being waited on hand and foot by their girlfriend or their cleaning woman, then they’re probably going out to a restaurant for Thanksgiving, in typical fagula fashion.

Of course!

But if a “man” actually took the time to use the beautiful kitchen in his waterfront condo, as well as the bougie ingredients he’s bought from the Bedford Cheese Shop, he might find that making something really isn’t that difficult. It just involves time and a soul, though, I guess, therein lies the problem. So if you’re dealing with a “man” who doesn’t cook in general and especially on Thanksgiving (some cranberry sauce, shit, anything), then you’re most likely dealing with someone of the dickless variety.