The emphasis on grooming and primping for men in Williamsburg and in general has long ago reached the point of parody. It makes no sense that any man would want to spend time or money on looking better when they could just as easily go around looking like shit and still get laid.

You see, it’s quite simple. Based on the ratio of women to men in this city–and on planet Earth–men have carte blanche in terms of their aesthetic. Women are basically just happy to encounter a straight man in the modern epoch. If you have a dick (which you probably don’t), a woman will be more interested in that fact than acknowledging that you’ve spend thousands of dollars on manscaping, designer clothes and a condo (the whole Patrick Bateman package). Just be your slovenly self. If I could, I would, but I’m missing a dick.